Hands up who’s glued to series nine of The Apprentice? A hand is raised here. Despite the known-formula and increasingly strident selection of candidates (at least on the part of most of the female participants, and that Neil bloke), it’s required viewing at Francis Towers and involves guaranteed shouting-at-the-telly action. I’m not sure if the producers select the participants on the basis of who makes the most ridiculous assertion about their own merits; “I’m half machine”, “I’m prepared to fight to the death to become Lord Sugar’s business partner” and “I feel my effortless superiority will take me all the way” featuring among the current crop. “Half machine” was fired in the first episode. This relentless blowing of one’s own trumpet no matter how mismatched to the available facts calls to mind Tre, a candidate in series three. And indeed, some people I've come across over the years here in the printing industry. Tre had a simple strategy, which was to repeatedly go on and on about how brilliant and successful he was, on the basis that enough people would believe this for him to get along quite nicely, thanks. Beware any potential employees who display such characteristics! Be sure to closely inspect whether there is substance behind the hot air. By all means blow your own trumpet when the circumstances warrant it, but who wants to hear an extended trumpet solo, every day?